Thursday, June 6, 2013

The Prayer of a Rusher

I've been a rusher my whole life. I always wanted to do the next thing, be older, get to the next step. I wanted to drive, to get a job,  to go to college, to travel, and I wanted to do it RIGHT NOW.
I never understood kids who loved childhood, the kids, like my sister Molly, who said they never wanted to grow up. Wouldn't it be better to be a teenager? Wouldn't it be better to be 21?
I did most things early.  I was so excited about what came next.
But now I'm a mama. I became a mama early, just like most things.
And now that I'm a mama, I want to learn to be still, to rest, to appreciate because today Sena is 3012 days old, Gus is 2298 days old, and Arlo is 178 days old, and that is only true for today.Tomorrow they will be one day older. They will be a little taller, a little wiser, a little less little tomorrow.
I can't wish and want so much that I rush their sweet childhood away.
Today I spent some time in prayer, asking for patience and peace and the ability to enjoy each moment without thinking about the next one.

These are the days of brother's sleeping together in their mama's bed, the days of sandcastles and little boys who want pictures of them. These are the days of babies scooting after big sisters. I don't know what the next day holds, so I'll just keep holding on to these people of mine instead. 

Please excuse not so good iPhone pictures. Sometimes these little moments are best captured that way. 

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